Goldberg Assignment - Story, Poem, Essay, Hybrid

Story

I awake to a cool morning breeze, and I feel free. Free to move, think and dream as the moment dictates. Here is a place I feel no restrictions.

I take a shower, pray and now my day begins. I pack a small bag for the day. It holds the necessaties for my escape. A bottle of water, sun screen, towel, a book and fruit. I am ready, eager to relax and release.

Quickly, I remove my shoes. A walk on the beach isn't the same if you can't feel the sand being sifted through your toes.

As I walk, the weight of my body pushes my feet deeper in the sand. I experience a momentary heaviness with each step, but the sand quickly gives release, it was a mere caress and I continue to walk, I am closer to the ocean, closer to my place, closer.

I can hear the movement of the ocean as it calls me. This is where I long to be. My inner being and the passions of the ocean resonate in the deepest way. It provides me an avenue of escape. No matter where I am, this special place awaits my arrival, and inside me is a constant longing to arrive. Jamaica, the place where heaven kisses the earth.

Poem

Ya ! Mon !

Here I have arrived

The place where heaven kisses earth in such a special way

Montego Bay !

I bring a troubled past and a questionable future

No matter , HERE ! ALL troubles cease

The movement of the ocean

The pull........... Embrace

Release........... Creates longing

How can this priceless gift be free ?

I tell you, for sure Ectasy in purest form was created here

Enjoy as much as the heart allows

Embrace

Montego Bay

Essay

Life is such a moving event, full of change, a mixture of good and bad. At times it seems like so much to bear. Once you make it through adolescence, college and at least past the age of 30 you get a clue that happiness comes even if it goes.

In the mean time if you can find a healthy escape, I highly recommend doing it. Find a place where you can escape and recover from unwanted drama or tragedy. Make sure you don't overstay your welcome. That would be counter productive and unhealthy.

If you can't get there by plane or car, meditation is a convenient low cost mode of transportation.

I love the beach and the ebb and flow of the ocean. I'm sure I was a beach babe in another life. Apart from sex, the beach and the ocean are my most pleasureable escapes.

Hybrid

I love walking on the beach with the sand gently carressing my toes. The ebb and flow of the ocean are such a relaxing comfort for me.

When I am drained and unpleasantness threatens to over take me

I Plan

Escape ! Meditate !

My most valuable form of transportation

Takes me where I lone to be

Completely

Me !

"What is a Word Worth ?"

Music

In music I find solace or a means of escape. Music is also a means of expression for me. I am a flute player. This provides me a path of musical expression that includes control and discipline. As a band member I enjoyed the competitive challenges and I appreciate the individual beauty of music especially through the saxaphone, guitar or violin.

Music is derived from the Greek word "mousike" and is defined as any art which the muses presided over, especially music. A muse is a guiding spirit or source of meditation. In classical mythology muse is any number of combinations of sister goddesses. Originally there was Aoede (song goddess), Melete (goddess of meditation) and Mneme (memory goddess). Later there were the daughters of Zeus, who presided over particular arts. There was Calliope who presided over epic poetry, Euterpe presided over music, Erato (lyric poetry) and Polyhymnia over religous music.

Music is natural, even nature (birds and animals) create music. I can hear music in my mind. Thru music I experience a range of emotions. I can be happy or sad. It allows me to meditate effectively. Relaxing my mind allows me to think clearly.

Psychology researchers Samuel Gosling and Jason Rentfrow conducted a study to categorize individual music preferences. They believe this study allowed them to reliably sort and categorize music preferences in relation to personality, intelligence and personal values. The following are some of the examples :

Reflective and Complex - people who prefer classical, jazz, folk or blues are inventive, have active imaginations and are tolerant of others. People who enjoy alternative, heavy metal or rock music are considered as intense and rebellious. They are curious, risk takers, are physically attractive and intelligent. People that prefer funk, hip-hop or soul music are talkative, energetic, forgiving and opposed to conservative ideals. Conventional music types who enjoyed country, religous or pop music were out going, cheerful and enjoyed helping others.

I truely believe that music can and often does speak louder than words. Music penetrates the fiber of my being. By feeling the vibrations in the body a deaf person can enjoy music. If they are holding a hollow object the feeling is enhanced. That can really give new meaning to the phrase "I feel the groove." When life is good it (music) feels good and when things are bad the music eases the pain. The famous composer Ludwig Van Beethoven was deaf, and he was still gifted with a beautiful music composition. Music has allowed me to create some special bonds with special people. Everytime I hear a particular song that enters my mind or my heart, I can enjoy their presence whether they are near or far. Music will always be a special gift to me.

Don't Let Me Be Lonely - Claudia Rankine

The flow of this book was fast and smooth. Claudia Rankine refers to this as a lyric essay, with elements of poetry and essay combined. There were images , information and facts coming at you one way. The following are a few points I found interesting :



Reference to a London game show : the contestant answers yes or no to questions if you fail to answer correctly or tell the truth, you must step down. The question was "Where you upset when Princess Diana died ? The contestant answered - "No". She had to step down, yet she told the truth. In the contestants mind the question should have been - was Princess Diana ever really alive to anyone outside of her family or friends ? The author also suggest that in as much as there was mourning for the death of Princess Di , people were
probably mourning the random inevitability of their own deaths.



When the news comes on the author switches the channel and refers to this as "a new tendancy of a deepening personality flaw."



There were numerable references to sad , depressing events, with pictures included. The author presented this and remained emotionally detached. She says "The real sadness is that I write this without my heart breaking and without bursting."



Cornel West says - Black people are to nihilistic

To scared by hope to hope

To experienced to experience

To close to dead !

He says these are symptoms of IMH - the inability to maintain hope and it translates into no innate trust in the supreme laws that govern us.



Some of the details and pictures were graphic and sad or disgusting, the author says



"What alerts, alters!"

Make not mistake about it this book should be considered a deep thought provoking political and social statement , used to alert us to the crisis that we have reached a point of being desensitised.

She she relates to these troubling events as something physical / physically experienced - and says it is not something that "I discuss socially ". This is another example of the layers of detachment .



There was a constant and underlying current of drugs and anti depressents for another means of escape.



She says "Felt wasteful to cry. To sentimental or excessive. Certainly not intellectual. To value each life to that point. To feel loss to the point of being bent over."



The following is quoted from the book and it refers to lonliness:



I felt it too

The loneliness ?

I let it happen

By feeling ?

By not not feeling

Thats to much ....

Like dying ?

Maybe, or death is second

Second to what ?

To loneliness.

Define loneliness

Dialogue

Rick - Hey Alice, I could sure use a fresh cup of coffee and some sweet conversation from a
dear friend

Alice - Coming right up Rick, good things are a little slow tonight
Here you go, strong and black with two sugars
I'm off in about 30 minutes if you want to take a walk on
the beach

Rick - Sounds great, I dropped a load of hardware off in Tampa earlier
Hit rush hour traffic, took me almost double the regular time to get here in Miami

Alice - I really missed you, sorry to hear about your brother
Let me close out my register and we can get out of here

Rick - Ready to roll ? You're the sexiest red head I've ever met. You're still single aren't you ?

Alice - You bet your sweet assets I'm single. Waiting for you to fall in love with me.

Rick - I was in love with you two years ago.... but ...... what's love got to do with marriage.

Alice - Let's not go there. Can we stop on the strip for a couple of drinks before we resume our
ritualistic stroll on the beach.......... under the moon light ?

Rodrigo Toscano Reading

The Toscano reading was interesting . It was definately a display of the functionality of words. They had fun with the performance and this was projected onto us, even if we didn't understand the meaning, you felt something. That something was yours to define as you choose, just as they defined and redefined words. They created new words and meanings. The performance voiced political and social issues. It was a clever display of crossing cultures and exchanging values. It was both enjoyable and interesting.

Humanimal A Project For Future Children

To my surprise I found the Humanimal Reading to be interesting .
I couldnt help comparing it to Incubation A Space For Monsters. Both books were graphic and colorful with a strong current of pain running through the pages.
Bhanu gave the background from which the story derived and that was quite interesting. She had the opportunity to travel with a film crew to the jungles of India to document the story of two orphaned girls, raised by wolves and reffered to as wolf girls.
Her words transferred the pain of the girls being both human and animal..... thus humanimal, no more human than animal. There was grafting (painful), described in the statement : " I slip my arms into the sleeves of your shirt. I slip my arms into yours, to become 4 limbed. "
The horrendous childhood of the wolf girls was intertwined with the brutal suffering Bhanu's Father endured as a child. Her Father died in his 50's and the doctor said it was a miracle that he endured that long. The condition of her Father's body told a harsh story at least in part. Just as the wolf girls with supinated arms revealed some of the pain they experienced.
I enjoyed some of the comments made after the reading, and I'll mention 2 of them. She said " Language glows / grows under cover as you change, multi layers are created. Words shift / modulate . "
Bhanu also mentioned a techinque called "vertical moment". This is when your hand lifts off the page, the moment before your hand comes down again creates linguistic space.

Comments / Points on Brian Evenson Story

I can't blame the intern for being suspicious of Dr. Rauch, his behavior is quite bizarre. The fact that he makes the intern feel that successful completion of the internship depends in part on the observance and documentation of Rauch's brother is unfair and needs to be reported. Yet, the intern makes no attempt to report it.

The intern seemingly gives little regard to his own well being, yet he says , "any analysis of the mental health of a subject must take into account the conditions to which said subject has been subjected". Which is a direct quote from Dr. Rauch. Then he goes on to say that considering his present conditions he finds himself healthier than can be expected.

When the intern ask Dr Rauch to examine him physically, the Dr. gives him a picture of himself and suggest that he immulate it. I would have considered that a confirmation that Dr. Rauch is looney too.